What distinguishes a normal blogger from a sex blogger? I was thinking about that as I was reading through a few blogs today in lack of better Saturday night entertainment. Some of them were sex blogs and some just normal blogs. I don’t really consider myself a sex blogger as I write about lots more than sex. But where does one draw the line?
I don’t thinkI could be a pure sex blogger anyway. In order to be a sex blogger,I think you need to be able to have casual sex, something I highly doubt I can. I have the habbit of falling in love with anyone I have any kind of sexual or slightly romantic relationship with. To be honest, I’ve never even had casual sex, so I’m not sure if that would be the case. However, I had a strange kind of phone relationship thing going on with this guy. It started of as an msn flirt which turned into some pretty hot phone sex. Over time I guess I fell for him. I was also on a high after just having broken up with my first long term boyfriend, Flying Dutchman. A break-up that should have happened way before it actually did.
One day, after a few months of regular phone sex, hot texts and instant messaging, I decided to tell this guy I was crazy about him. He wasn’t a stranger or anything, I had met him once at a camp/conference in Hungary, but not since. I was getting sick of the thing with him going nowhere. He had lots of excuses for not being able to meet up with me, which I believe were real excuses, but it was still odd that it could never happen. So, I picked up the courage and texted him in a lunch break between two uni classes. I think I wrote something like, “Hi. I just thought I’d let you know that I fancy you like crazy.” Something along those lines. Afterwards, I had that feeling of just wanting to shoot myself, or disappear from the earth at least! When my phone vibrated in my pocket half an hour later, I was feeling tense and restless. The text from him read something along those lines. “As you know, I think you’re really sexy and bright but I don’t think it would work. One reason is distance, the other is the age gap. i think you’d be better off with and have more fun with someone who’re at your stage in life. ”
My first reaction was tears. I think this was more anger and tension release than anything. The distance I could understand, but the age gap? He was five years older than me and when you’re past 20 I frankly don’t think it matters at all. I sent him a few angry texts that day and felt down for a couple of days, but got over it pretty quickly. We’re still good friends today and we did continue the phone sex for a while. I’ve told him though, that if he wants me again, he has to fuck me for real! He claims to have fantasized about me for the two years after that little incident which I find strange, seeing as he only saw me once in a work situation six months ago. I guess someone can hold fantasies alive, or he’s just trying to flatter me. I don’t care really. If something happens it does and if not, it doesn’t. I think already having a bit of a history with him will help me not to fall in love with him. I think it would be an over all problem for me with other guys though, with whom I don’t have a history.
I know this post has been a whole lot of waffling, so sorry about that. I’m gonna go for lunch in Hammersmith tomorrow, or later today technically, with HMF, HB, Baby G, Miss C and possibly some other people. Then one of my best friends who happens to be the number 1 goalball player in Britain has invited me to come and play in Bucks tomorrow evening. I used to be on the Norwegian national team and I became Norwegian champion once, but had to quit because of an enormous amount of work in Highschool. Not that I did any homeworks if I could finish it off at school, but our school system is very socialistic which means constant groupwork, constant group projects and lots of researching and handing in, of course in groups which had to be done outside class. I really want to play goalball, but the trip to Bucks which takes 90 minutes and involves tube, train and bus changes puts me off a little. I’ll have a think and make my mind up some time tomorrow afternoon.
Off to bed now!
Tags: Baby G, Bucks, Casual sex, Goalball, Hammersmith, HB, HMF, love, Miss C
